The Vampires


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Real vampires, he says, have existed as an organized community for nearly 30 years, and in solitary for far longer. Some chose to align with like-minded through courts and houses, though the majority, he says, do not.

Vampirism is perhaps an unfortunate term, admits John Edgar Browning, a researcher who has studied real vampire communities in New Orleans and Buffalo for nearly a decade. According to Browning, real vampires have carved out their identity using very little of the pop-cultural representation.

Vampire defense and protection

And while the mainstream may love vampires on screen, those who identify as such live in deep fear of hate crime and discrimination. Unfortunately, the fictitious misconceptions have translated into real-life stigmas.

A study published by DJ Williams of Idaho State University raised alarm that individuals from the community rarely reveal their practices to clinicians, fearing they be labeled psychopathological in some way, or even wicked. To preserve the intensity of the fear and emotion reported by participants, Williams chose to present their questionaire responses in poetic structures.

No, I would never do that! It would detract From real issues For which I was seeking treatment. I have no desire to be classified As delusional, Immature, Or a threat to public safety. Social workers, psychologists, and counselors Should listen And be open. They need to know more About spiritual things. And not immediately jump To treating a disorder. For us, vampirism is normal. While Merticus does not deny the inherently predatory nature of vampirism, he insists that an overwhelming majority adhere to ethical and safe feeding practices, are of sound mind and judgment and productively contribute to society.

Those who have studied the community agree.

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But I do think that we are moving into an era where social justice for a much wider variety of diverse identities and communities will be a key societal issue. Real vampirism, admittedly, is still a nascent field of research. While waiting for academia to catch up, advocates from inside the community commissioned their own study Merticus was part of orchestrating it. It gathered participants in 40 countries across all continents between and , and found that real vampires reported a far greater than normal incidence of medical ailments such as asthma, chronic fatigue, fibromyalgia and endocrine system disorders than the general population.

As serious research picks up by social and hopefully medical science, Merticus hopes to find not only answers, but also that acknowledgment may lead to increased acceptance for his kind. Or should vampires retreat underground to avoid judgment? You're almost done. Connect to your existing Cracked account if you have one or create a new Cracked username.

Bram Stoker's Dracula may have put vampires on the map more than a century ago , but modern writers like Anne Rice, Joss Whedon, and Stephenie Meyer tweaked the concept to create the new breed of undead we suffer through today. These vamps are generally sexy, brooding, and occasionally sparkly beings who have infected everything from books and movies to television shows and porn.

So why are they all into teenage girls?


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Yes, if you're a male member of the undead population, the hottest thing going is apparently a teen maybe early 20s girl. But are we really supposed to accept that a year-old vampire like Angel wants nothing more in the world than year-old Buffy Summers?

Vampires: Is It Real? - National Geographic

And before you say, "Oh, but he became a vampire when he was 26," when has it been OK for a year-old to stalk a year-old? Damon Salvatore, roughly years old, is going to enjoy domestic bliss with Elena, who's a tenth his age? Edward Cullen, the year-old with over years of experience, finds Bella Swan his intellectual equal? What possible common ground could these couples have, really?

Exiting the Vampire Castle | openDemocracy

They can't go to a park or enjoy dinner together, and sooner or later their relationship is going to literally and metaphorically suck. Why don't vampires find a working-class single mom with tons of life experience and be like, "Wow, I truly respect you. Become my bride of the night. She's probably super interesting to talk to!

But that doesn't mean they need to do their shopping in high schools like a proud van owner. One Vampire Diaries actor even described his character's much younger love interest as "the ultimate case of cradle robbing.

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Even if they insist on nurturing these gross relationships, why, dear god why, would they volunteer to go to high school forever? You already need a fake ID; just bump it a few years and accept the compliment when somebody says you look young. There are even other ways to creep! Edward Cullen mentions playing piano and listening to music during the many sleepless nights he doesn't spend stalking Bella.

Why doesn't every vampire play half a dozen instruments?

Vampire History

All vampires should at least play guitar. Even if they don't care about bettering themselves, they could join a band, which has always helped old perverts attract teenage fans. And why on Earth wouldn't they find a nice female vampire with similar interests who could truly be their peer and settle down? Why in the world wouldn't Eric like Pam?

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